There's No Place Like Home

I’ve realized that what is difficult about being in a foreign place, with unknown people, new foods, and totally different attire is simply the feeling of it being foreign. That is all. Often what is scary and undesirable about a person, place or thing (perhaps the word noun came to mind) is that it is unfamiliar.

Familiarity is one of the sweetest feelings ever. We love to grow closer to people and feel comfortable enough to open a friend’s fridge, sit on a friend’s bed or speak to him or her in a way that other people cannot or would dare not. We love the kinds of relationships where words aren’t even necessary. There is comfort there, in the familiarity of understanding and loving one another and rarely feeling awkward. In being able to communicate and be understood by the other. In many ways, even if other people treat us better, we prefer what is most familiar. In most cases, a child will choose mom even if she is critical or unstable or struggling with drug use or slow to show physical affection just because she’s mom. That connection is of the deepest with regards to familiarity.

I think about the movie Pursuit of Happyness with Will Smith and his son. They faced serious struggles and in one of the saddest scenes they fall asleep on the bathroom floor of the dirty subway because they were homeless. Though Will Smith cried in that moment at the thought of not being able to provide his son with shelter, the boy fell asleep as happy as ever. Dad turned the situation into a game and there was much comfort and laughter for the boy until he fell asleep in his father’s arms. What a powerful scene. The comfort of being with dad was enough for the boy to remain emotionally stable and even content in these circumstances. There was a familiarity that was strong enough to make the foreign aspects of homelessness feel okay.

Being in India, learning different languages (yes, plural), eating a variety of different foods (almost all spicy), in a different way (I haven’t used a fork in two months), while wearing completely distinct clothing (trying to remember what jeans feel like), and embracing the unique mannerisms and unspoken social norms has not been that difficult. And living in the culture means I get to understand why people do or say the things they do or say, which makes it easier to adapt. The challenge is in the familiarity piece.

I’ve had to ask myself, what brings me most comfort? What or where is my familiar place?

If like Will Smith’s son, my place of comfort is in Dad’s Presence (capital D), then wherever He is feels like home. This has been one remarkable reality here. The feeling of being able to eat anything, wear whatever, sleep anywhere, and do whichever task is given, hangs on His presence. There is so much freedom in this thought. He will never leave me and will always lead me down paths of righteousness for His Name’s sake.

Where He is present and I am faithfully abiding, that place will feel familiar. Where He is loved will never feel strange no matter what language is being spoken. Removing shoes and covering my head to enter a place of worship, where men and women sit on opposite sides and dare not speak until it’s time to pray aloud or greet others when the opportunity is granted is not a foreign feeling. This is how He is loved and exalted where I am.

Strange is being with people who claim to love Christ and look dead in worship. Foreign is the places or gatherings that are void of the Giver of Life.

The difficult days I’ve had here are the same as the difficult days at home---when I get distracted and stop abiding in Him. Everything feels uncomfortable in those times and I get the feeling that I’m missing something or someone or everything or everyone. Everything feels foreign. I’ve had so many moments of realizing how deeply attached I am or was or am or was (still struggling) to different people.  I miss so many people terribly. Especially those with whom I have the deepest fellowship—my sister, my team, my Jonathan. I’ve cried many tears over these people.

Through the pain of detachment though, there is a sweetness to feeling “at home” even in this room alone because God is here.

This is a gift. One that He promised to all those who would repent and believe in Christ, namely, the Holy Spirit. He is the reason people can move to foreign lands and learn new languages and eat new foods with people of another color and die and be buried thousands of miles from family. He is the reason people can endure hardships, trials, persecution, rejection, famine for the sake of Christ.

He is the One who has been boldly testifying to my heart that every place on earth is foreign because my home is in heaven. And yet every place can feel familiar because the One who reigns in heaven lives in me.

“So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God.” Ephesians 2:19

 “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:35, 37-39

Waiting To Hear

I sit here in India, meditating on my morning reading in Matthew 14.

A very familiar passage about Jesus walking on water and Peter getting out of the boat. Now, I've grown up in church so I've heard this passage preached a million times in different ways, but drawing the same point. Mainly about getting out of our "boat"or our "comfort zones" if we want to do the impossible and get to Jesus. It is right on.

But this morning as the Spirit spoke, I was drawn to Peter's words:

"Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water."

Peter was known to put his foot in his mouth. He was the bolder one who would speak things without thinking first and would inevitably and continuously be corrected by the Lord. I mean, to the point where Peter tried to hinder Jesus from going to the cross and was sharply rebuked by Jesus with a "get behind me Satan." I don't know about you, but I would NEVER want to hear the Lord tell me that.

But in this case, he is commendable. He looks out, along with the other disciples, and sees something scary. It looked like a ghost. It was someone walking towards them ON WATER, in the dark, with the winds against him, at three or four in the morning. I'd be petrified, too. As soon as Peter realizes that this may be Jesus, he expresses his desire to go TOWARDS what is terrifying and in a way that only the Lord could enable. Walking on water.

I love that what is frightening suddenly becomes so intriguing because Jesus is there.

Here we are in this boat that represents safety and comfort, surrounded by others like ourselves. But there, in the winds, in the dark, above the elements which would normally cause us to sink, is Jesus. And man, does that boat look terribly dull. Knowing that Jesus is out in the scary and unknown makes staying in that boat scarier. It's the fear we feel when we're stuck in the same place just because we know nothing different or are unwilling to step into the unknown. The fear of being like a mouse in a wheel. Running and getting nowhere. When we look at it like that, we see that it should be more terrifying to STAY in the boat.

But beyond this, again, I am drawn to Peter's request. In his bold spontaneuity, he doesn't immediately climb out of the boat and run to Jesus. He calls upon Him and asks for Him to give the word.

Yes, God Himself had orchestrated this moment. But it came from Peter to request the command. He waited to hear the Lord speak and only then did he act. He saw what He could do--namely, the impossible--for the Lord and yet asked for Him to speak a word.

Jesus said, "Come."

Is it any surprise that Jesus would command that which is most difficult, most impossible and most challenging to his faith?

Is it any surprise that Jesus would command that which would put this kind of faith and dependence on display for others to see and give glory to Him?

Not at all. This is the Master I've come to know.

Sometimes the hardest word is, "stay."

Sometimes the hardest word is, "wait."

Regardless of what He commands, however, it is HIS will that we want. It is what HE knows is best that will lead us to more of Him and more souls to be added to the Kingdom of Heaven. It is HIS word that we must wait for.

But not passively.

Like Peter, we must see Him in the danger and say "please Lord...here am I....send me....give the command...say the word...."

I reflected this morning on how He called me to India for this season. I can remember reading about this precious people. I remember looking out of my boat and seeing Jesus in the darkest, stormiest of places, conquering all natural elements to bring glory to the Father and salvation to those who would believe. I can remember wanting to be here and asking Him to give me the word. I can remember being invited to come by a man, but knowing it wasn't the time of the Lord. I was waiting for the command.

The command was given this past January. And I sit here now, in May, wondering what is about to unfold before me.

I wish to grow more in waiting to hear His voice. I desperately want to depend on "every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."

I want to be like the centurion. So confident in the authority of Jesus' words that he had no need for Him to physically lay hands on his sick servant. "But only say the word and my servant will be healed."

I want to be confident that if I look out and see a multitude too large to feed, that when Jesus says, "YOU give them something to eat," I trust that He will grant what He commands as He commands what He wills.

That I would wait for the command and go where He sends, when He sends, knowing that this kind of dependence and obedience produces more fruit than a thousand good deeds from my own strength and will.

That at His word I would cast a net and see what HE does when all submits to the authority of His word. It's HIS word that speaks life to dry bones. It's HIS word that speaks healing to a sick body or a wounded heart. It's HIS word that gives sight to the blind, both physically and spiritually. It's HIS word that even commands the winds and the seas. It's HIS word that casts out demons and binds the brokenhearted and even declares, in the depths of our depravity, "take heart, my son, your sins are forgiven."

Even today, I wait for the command. Whatever He speaks will be enough for me. And in obeying I will do the impossible and get to Jesus. What could be better?

Soul Food

There are things in this life that do nothing for my soul.

Well, maybe not nothing. But rather, nothing to stir up affections for the One in whom my soul is satisfied.

I know in my mind that my soul is satisfied in Christ alone. Yet I too often lie to myself and engage in “good” things or “harmless” things that don’t help me love Him more. And though I engage in these activities without the guilt of “committing sin,” I always realize when it’s over that if it wasn’t done fully for His glory or if it didn't produce thanksgiving in myself or others, my soul is disappointed. It will again long for something meaningful. Namely, anything that boasts in Jesus as the all-satisfying Treasure.
(Thanks, Piper.)

Take, for instance, shopping. I need to first say that shopping is not sinful, and in much of life it is in fact necessary. But man. Going to the mall does nothing for my soul.

It does not remind me of how rich I am in Christ Jesus.

It does not remind me of how much I have been given to steward on this earth.

Nor does it remind me that the Lord is my Shepherd and I shall not want.

It does not help me to remember that more than seventy percent of the world lives on two dollars a day or less.

It does not remind me of the urgency with which I must preach that God—not stuff—is what we truly crave because our souls were fashioned to be satisfied in Him alone.

If and when I leave a mall, having purchased something for myself, I usually don’t feel bad and I don’t have to.  But deep down, most times, I can readily admit that I didn't need what I had just purchased and would have felt a greater joy in using that money to show how much more I treasure Jesus.

So if you know me you know that you will likely never run into me at the mall. And these years of rarely going have given me a sweet freedom that is hard to explain.

Huge parenthesis:

(But because I do like to purchase things, and due to being somewhat impulsive in buying, I have found a greater joy in going online to a couple of different websites where I can “shop.” Such as:

·  gfa.org/donation [buy sewing machines, scholarship for literacy classes, blankets, bibles, bicycles for missionaries, winter packets, etc.]

·    amazima.org [buy necklaces from impoverished women, many who have left shameful lifestyles to provide for poor families; donate towards feeding a village, etc.]

·  amazon.com [many of the best books were written by preachers from centuries past and they are both life changing and dirt cheap on Amazon.]

Again, my soul rejoices more in Jesus when, by His grace, I can stir my affections towards the things and people He loves most.)

As a second but last example for now, let’s take watching movies.

I’ve never been a fan of staring at a screen. So my boredom with television comes from my younger years not necessarily from when I came to know the Lord. I’ve always liked real people in real life. And even the movies that I do like are based on true stories.

In being adamantly opposed to legalism I have to say as I did with shopping: watching movies is not sinful. It can be very relaxing and entertaining at times.

But, let’s face it. The vast majority of what people watch in movies does nothing to stir our affections for the Lord.

There are many things the Lord Jesus despises that our society sees as normal.

It is normal in our day to know of couples who live and sleep together not being married. But not to the holy, loving God I know.

It is normal for people to flippantly use the Lord’s holy name. But the LORD has made it clear that we are not to use this glorious Name in vain.

It is normal to see couples on television or in life that are openly homosexual. And normal to joke about homosexuality. The Lord makes it clear that these relationships are unnatural and sinful.

It is normal in modern American society to see children defy their parents and openly slander people in authority. But our Creator demands that we honor our mother and father and all those who are in authority.

 What can we say about sexual immorality all together, if biblically we are not even to MENTION things that hint at sexual immorality or have any kind of course joking on our lips?

Or about hatred and murder? We can go on and on.

And yet these are all things we commonly see in the latest movies. Often, Lord help us, we laugh at the very things that God hates. The very things about man that our Savior was crucified for. We become numb to the taking of human life because we see people kill people in movies all the time. Relationships become cheap because they are based on lust, which Hollywood does a great job portraying as “love”. We see anger, jealousy and revenge and laugh. We hear our Lord’s name thrown around and we’ve become so accustomed that we don’t even notice.

I don’t know about you, but watching these things, even if they’re just hints throughout a movie, do nothing to help me love Jesus. Our fire can easily be quenched if we are in the habit of carelessly heeding to Hollywood’s way of life through constant viewing.

And worse. Over time, our minds, hearts, and souls shrink down to the level of what we see. We are what we eat. If our minds are constantly engaged in meaningless things that serve only to produce a quick laugh in the moment, our capacity to fathom true grandeur is greatly diminished. It’s like watching three hours of Family Guy and walking into church hoping to rejoice in the wonders of the cross and the glory of our eternal King. Good luck. It’s too long of a journey for my soul to go from profane to profound—vain to praiseworthy—in a moment. There’s too much of a disconnect. Our affections for Jesus are weakened. Our appetites for His Word are ruined. We fill our souls with crap and find ourselves too full to eat Bread of Life.

That’s not even to mention the countless hours spent watching and being emotionally involved with fictitious characters while real people, many who are on their way to a real eternity of suffering, surround us. Two billion (yes, two hundred million) are still waiting to hear about Jesus FOR THE FIRST TIME.

So I know that I have to be jealous. Jealous to keep my mind from being distracted. Jealous to keep my heart from wanting to be made complete in someone or something other than God. Jealous to keep my soul away from “good” things that don’t satisfy it and close to great things that stir me up in love and zeal for Jesus. I want to watch things that remind me that the world is LOST and hopeless without Christ. I want to listen to things that remind of God’s incomparable attributes. I want to read about things that remind me that as I lay down my life in love, He will use it to change the world. I want to engage in activities that at the end of the day leave me emptied of myself yet filled with Him. Yes. With Him.

My soul thirsts for the Living God. I will not give it anything less.   

Sweet meditation from one of my favorite chapters in Scripture:

“Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food.  Incline your ear, and come to me; hear me that you soul may live..." Isaiah 55:1-3a

Getting Ready For My Wedding Day

Sometimes I wish I were Jewish. The apostle Paul boasts of them saying,

“They are Israelites, and to them belong the adoption, the glory, the covenants, the giving of the law, the worship, and the promises. To them belong the patriarchs, and from their race, according to the flesh, is the Christ, who is God over all, blessed forever. Amen.” Romans 9:4-5

They were, and in many ways still are, the chosen people of God. But because of their rejection of the Messiah, and by the sheer mercy of Christ, I am of His chosen people also. J

Of the many traditions and customs the Jewish people held (and in some countries still hold) learning about one custom has recently made my heart sing. It has made me see more clearly how I am to prepare for the Big Day—my wedding day.

You see, I’m kind of engaged. Or really I am married. To Jesus that is. Which sounds somewhat cheesy, but it is profoundly biblical and sacred. Even when I do marry on earth I will still be married to Jesus. And of course, so will my earthly husband.

But even when we’re married, we’ll both be waiting for the Big Day—the day Jesus comes to judge the earth and marry His Bride, the Church, once and for all.

As a female, it’s easier for me to see myself as Jesus’ bride. But in a spiritual sense both men and women who belong to Jesus—by grace, through faith in Him—are His Bride. The Church is His Bride and He is the Bridegroom. Interestingly though, we’re not married yet. But biblically, we are now Husband and Wife. And up until recently this seemed not to make any sense! I mean, are we engaged or are we married?

And the answer is yes.  Or neither.

There’s much talk of this in the Scriptures. In fact, the command for earthly husbands to love their wives comes directly from the example of Christ loving His Wife, the Church.

  

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that He might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish." Ephesians 5:25-27

So I am His. But there seems to be this time period in which He is preparing me to…well…

Be His.

It seems like more than an engagement, but not marriage in its total form. So again, this is when I think of the blessing the Jewish people have to possess such rich traditions. In researching their marriage customs, I began to understand deeply what this all means.

Take it in:

Jewish Marriage Customs

The first major step in a Jewish marriage was betrothal.

1.    Betrothal involved the establishment of a marriage covenant. By Jesus' time it was usual for such a covenant to be established as the result of the prospective bridegroom taking the initiative.

2.  The prospective bridegroom would travel from his father's house to the home of the prospective bride. There he would negotiate with the father of the young woman to determine the price (mohar) that he must pay to purchase his bride.

3.  Once the bridegroom paid the purchase price, the marriage covenant was thereby established, and the young man and woman were regarded to be husband and wife.

4.   From that moment on the bride was declared to be consecrated or sanctified, set apart exclusively for her bridegroom.

5. As a symbol of the covenant relationship that had been established, the groom and bride would drink from a cup of wine over which a betrothal benediction had been pronounced.

6.  After the marriage covenant had been established, the groom would leave the home of the bride and return to his father's house. There he would remain separate from his bride for a period of twelve months.

7.  This period of separation afforded the bride time to gather her trousseau and to prepare for married life.

8.     The groom occupied himself with the preparation of living accommodations in his father's house to which he could bring his bride. At the end of the period of separation the groom would come to take his bride to live with him. The taking of the bride usually took place at night. The groom, best man and other male escorts would leave the groom's father's house and conduct a torch light procession to the home of the bride.

9.   Although the bride was expecting her groom to come for her, she did not know the exact time of his coming.

10.  As a result the groom's arrival would be preceded by a shout.

11. This shout would forewarn the bride to be prepared for the coming of the groom. After the groom received his bride together with her female attendants, the enlarged wedding party would return from the bride's home to the groom's father's house.

12. Upon arrival there the wedding party would find that the wedding guests had assembled already. Shortly after arrival the bride and groom would be escorted by the other members of the wedding party to the bridal chamber (huppah). Prior to entering the chamber the bride remained veiled so that no one could see her face.

13.  While the groomsmen and bridesmaids would wait outside, the bride and groom would enter the bridal chamber alone. There in the privacy of that place they would enter into physical union for the first time, thereby consummating the marriage that had been covenanted earlier.

14. After the marriage was consummated, the groom would announce the consummation to the other members of the wedding party waiting outside the chamber (John 3:29). These people would pass on the news of the marital union to the wedding guests.

15. Upon receiving this good news the wedding guests would feast and make merry for the next seven days.

How amazing is that?

We are, as Mary and Joseph were before Jesus was born, betrothed. The Man Christ Jesus, leaves His Father’s home to get His bride. He pays the bride-price, none other than His blood on that glorious cross.  The night before He gives His life, He seals this covenant over a cup of wine and promises His Holy Spirit, the seal and symbol of our union.  Jesus returns to His Father’s house, after the resurrection, to prepare a place for us. We stay preparing and making sure our garments are spotless and wrinkle-free. We’re to be set apart unto Him and sanctified by His Spirit in preparing for His coming. We know His coming is near, though no one knows the day nor the hour. He will come like a thief in the night. But right before that we will hear a “cry of command” with a trumpet sound.

When that day comes, all things will be ready. We will even have a cloud of witnesses—the people who were a part of our journey throughout, who we so deeply admire, and have longed to finally meet in heaven. We will celebrate the spiritual consummation of Jesus and the Church and we will feast and make merry. It will be unlike anything ever seen, heard or told in all eternity.

So much to think about.

I think of all these things and wonder how badly I long for Jesus to come. I mean, if I’m really His wife as of now then I belong solely to Him—heart, mind, soul and strength. The covenant has been sealed by the Holy Spirit He gave me. And, everything in me should, as it often does, long for that big day—the day of the Wedding of the Lamb and His Bride.

Yes. I do long for that day and my heart sings for joy. I can’t wait. I’m anxiously awaiting and preparing for my wedding day. This will be the day when I finally see my Husband face to face to live—quite literally—happily ever after.

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“Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready;" Revelation 19:7

“But at midnight there was a cry, ‘Here is the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.'" Matthew 25:6

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband." Revelation 21:1-2

“Then came one of the seven angels who had the seven bowls full of the seven last plagues and spoke to me, saying, "Come, I will show you the Bride, the wife of the Lamb." Revelation 21:9

“For as a young man marries a young woman, so shall your sons marry you, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you." Isaiah 62:5

“In my Father's house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.” John 14:2-3

 “For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first.” 1 Thessalonians 4:16

“For I feel a divine jealousy for you, since I betrothed you to one husband, to present you as a pure virgin to Christ." 2 Corinthians 11:2

”Therefore you also must be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect." Matthew 24:44

 “I will greatly rejoice in the LORD; my soul shall exult in my God, for he has clothed me with the garments of salvation; he has covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decks himself like a priest with a beautiful headdress, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. Isaiah 61:10

Beethoven, Eat Your Heart Out

It’s difficult not to overthink what to share as a first blog. Especially when this feels vastly overdue and there seems to be an endless list of things I’d love to express in writing.  But I will begin by sharing why I decided to name my blog Ode to Joy.

An ode is defined as: a lyric poem typically of elaborate or irregular metrical form and expressive of exalted or enthusiastic emotion.

And joy is defined as: The emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying.

Ten years ago, I met Someone who became for me the greatest Delight and Happiness. He was and is exceptionally good and satisfying. My heart was made new. For the first time I felt, and since then have known, a deep, unshakable joy. And my desire is that you would feel that joy in every post, in every paragraph.

His name is Jesus.

He is both my journey and my destination. He is the reason I breathe. The reason I live each day. The reason I work and sing and cry and laugh. And if He decided otherwise, I would cease to breathe and He would owe me no explanations. He is God. And He is worthy of every bit of everything that I am and do. In this, my heart overflows with a joy that no one can take away.

This is not just my story. This is my song. I hope to continually write in elaborate or irregular metrical (or musical) form.  Yes, it will begin as a thought from my mind. Or perhaps a feeling from my heart. But each entry should lead to express the song in my soul with exalted or enthusiastic emotion.

There are passages of Scripture that together make up the anthem of my life. One of them has always been Psalms 37:4.

“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

God has been very sneaky with this truth. He doesn’t directly mention that as I delight in Him, my desires change.  And He doesn’t mention that as He becomes my joy, I enjoy what He enjoys and ultimately ask for things that bring Him joy and fill me and others with joy as well. J I’ve asked for many things—simple and complex. And one after another He has granted “my” desire, bringing me closer to His heart along the way. Again, He is both my journey and my destination; both my story and my song. I can say that my life has been beautifully orchestrated by the One to whom sings my soul.  

So let this be an ode to joy. An ode to a wonderfully arranged, beautifully orchestrated, unfathomable life of joy.